1025: Protect Your Energy This October with Gentle Boundaries

October (as you are very well aware) is Breast Cancer Awareness Month...a time when pink ribbons, fundraising walks, and research campaigns take center stage.

And let me be clear: I’m grateful for the awareness, research, and treatment advances that this month supports. That work matters deeply.

But if you’re a breast cancer survivor, October can feel complicated. Because when you’ve lived through breast cancer, there isn’t a single day you’re not aware of this life-changing event. You don’t need a ribbon or an ad campaign to remind you.

In fact, for many survivors, October can be highly triggering.

 

When you’ve lived through breast cancer, there isn’t a single day you’re not aware.

Why Breast Cancer Awareness Month Can Feel Heavy

On the outside, it’s all about unity, support, and progress. But inside, it can feel very different:

• Pink triggers: Ribbons, events, and ads that seem to be everywhere can bring back memories you’d rather not relive.

• Emotional whiplash: You may feel grateful one moment and weighed down with grief or anxiety the next.

• Pressure to participate: Friends, family, or organizations may expect you to join in fundraisers or walks when you simply don’t have the energy or desire. 

• The survivor “badge”: Instead of feeling celebrated, you may feel reduced to just one part of your identity.

And here’s something rarely acknowledged: most awareness campaigns focus on research and treatment. But what about the after care? The part where treatment ends, but life doesn’t just go back to “normal.”

That’s where so many survivors feel forgotten.

 🎧 Listen 👇: I share why October can feel so heavy and how the teapot analogy helps explain energy leaks after treatment. 

Life After Breast Cancer: Where the Awareness Is Needed Too

After the last appointment, scan, or surgery, the world often assumes you’re “done.” But what nobody tells you is that the real work of recovery is only beginning.

Post-treatment life can bring:

• Lingering fatigue that makes even simple tasks, like unloading the dishwasher, feel monumental.

• Brain fog that leaves you second-guessing yourself...I remember thinking "I know I know how to send an email!!"

• Emotional heaviness...grief, fear of recurrence, or anxiety that no one seems to talk about or acknowledge.

• Relationship shifts that feel confusing and lonely.

And it’s not just physical. Survivors often leak energy in ways that are harder to spot...but just as exhausting.

 

Exhaustion isn’t laziness. It’s an energy leak. 

How Exhaustion Shows Up in Everyday Life

Fatigue after breast cancer isn’t just about feeling tired. It weaves its way into every corner of life...sometimes in ways no one else notices, but you feel deeply.

• In relationships: You say yes to dinner with friends, even though your body begs for rest. You plaster on a smile while your heart whispers, I just want to be home in my pajamas. Later, you replay the whole night, worrying if you seemed “off.” Worrying Will they even invite me next time?

• In your career: A simple meeting leaves you drained for the rest of the day. You stare at your computer, knowing what needs to be done but unable to summon the focus. You wonder, Will I ever feel sharp and capable again? Will I get fired? 

• In your confidence: You push through laundry when your (T-Rex) arms feel like lead. When you can’t keep up, the inner critic pipes up: I’m failing my family. I should be stronger.

• In your joy: The hobbies or passions you once loved...gardening, painting, even dancing in the kitchen...sit untouched. It’s not that you don’t want to. It’s that your body feels like it’s on pause while the rest of life moves on.

These aren’t small inconveniences.

They’re daily reminders that life after breast cancer can feel nothing like life before it. And when October amplifies the noise with pink ribbons and expectations, the exhaustion can feel louder than ever.

🎧 Listen 👇: One client’s story that shows how exhaustion isn’t laziness, it’s an energy leak.

Where Your Energy Leaks Out in October

Boundaries are the key to protecting your energy, but first it helps to notice where you’re losing it. During October especially, energy leaks can show up in six different ways:

🎧 Listen 👇: I walk you through the six ways your energy may be leaking this October.

💛 Physical leaks: when your body feels bone-tired, even after rest. Pushing through walks, housework, or events only to crash later.

💛 Emotional leaks: when your heart feels heavy. Pink ribbons or stories bring back waves of grief, guilt, or fear you thought you’d worked through.

💛 Mental leaks: when your mind won’t quiet. Thoughts spiral: Am I doing enough? What if it comes back? Shouldn’t I feel stronger by now?

💛 Relational leaks: when others’ expectations pull at your energy. Friends, family, or organizations may not realize how much their invitations or requests drain you.

💛 Environmental leaks: when your surroundings overwhelm you. The flood of pink ads, fundraising campaigns, or even clutter in your own space leaves you overstimulated, often wanting to put your head in the sand and just hide until it's safe to come out.

💛 Spiritual leaks: when you feel disconnected from your body, your faith, trust, or purpose. Instead of feeling supported, October can leave you questioning.

Left unprotected, these leaks can leave you feeling like you’re back at square one...exhausted, isolated, and powerless.

The Power of Gentle Boundaries

Not long after my treatment ended, a friend invited me to a breast cancer fundraiser dinner. My first instinct was to say yes...it felt like the “right” thing to do. But the truth? I was already exhausted from the day, and the thought of putting on a brave face in a room full of people made my chest feel tight.

That night, I pushed through anyway. And the next day, I was bone-tired, achy, and beating myself up for not being stronger. That was the moment I realized: if I kept giving my yes when my body whispered no, I was going to stay stuck in exhaustion.

🎧 Listen: The night I learned boundaries aren’t walls, they’re like a soft blanket keeping your energy safe.

This is where gentle boundaries come in.

Boundaries don’t have to be hard lines or walls that push people away. They can be soft, nurturing, and protective....like a favorite soft blanket that keeps you warm and safe.

Gentle boundaries are a way of saying: My energy matters. My peace matters. My healing matters.

With boundaries, you can:

• Plug the energy leaks that drain you.

• Reclaim space for joy, rest, and creativity.

• Reduce the guilt and “shoulds” that weigh you down.

• Build safety and self-trust in a month that often feels overwhelming.

And most importantly, you send yourself the message: I matter too.

 

Boundaries aren’t selfish. They’re sacred self-care.

3 Gentle Boundaries to Try This October

1. Protect Your Yes

Before committing to anything...whether it’s a fundraiser, social event, or even family dinner...pause and ask: Do I truly have the energy for this? Do I want to?

👉 Try this script: “Thank you for thinking of me. I can’t commit right now, but I’ll be cheering you on.”

2. Limit Exposure to Triggers

It’s okay to step back when something leaves you feeling heavy. Whether it’s a conversation, a social media post, or a TV ad, you have permission to protect your peace.

👉 Try this script: “I appreciate you sharing, but I need to protect my energy right now. Can we talk about something lighter?”

3. Say Yes to You

What restores you...rest, a walk in nature, time with someone safe...matters just as much as anything else on your calendar. Schedule it in and treat it as non-negotiable.

👉 Gentle boundary: Put it in your planner first, not last.

Why Boundaries Aren’t Selfish

One of the biggest myths about boundaries is that they’re selfish. But in reality, they’re sacred self-care.

They don’t keep others out. They keep your energy safe so you can show up more fully for yourself and the people you love.

Boundaries are welcome mats, not walls. They say: This is the kind of care and peace I welcome into my life.

And in a month that can feel especially draining, they’re one of the most powerful gifts you can give yourself.

You don’t need to be stronger. You need to be supported.

Your Next Step to Safeguard Your Energy

If October feels heavier than you expected, it’s not your fault. You were never meant to do this alone...or without tools that truly support your recovery.

That’s why I created my free guide: 7 Boundaries to Safeguard Your Energy.

Inside, you’ll find:
✨ Simple scripts you can use right away.
✨ Gentle ways to say no without guilt.
✨ Practical tips to protect your peace...physically, emotionally, and mentally.

Because boundaries aren’t selfish. They’re how you protect your energy, reclaim your peace, and feel safe in your own body and mind again.

And this October, you deserve exactly that.