#20: Why is Prioritizing Self-Care So Hard?

self-care
Karin Del Maestro
#20: Why is Prioritizing Self-Care So Hard?
26:29
 

Have you ever had plans to workout, take that yoga class you’ve been looking forward to, or meal prep for the coming week...and then you’ve just felt too tired and said screw it, I’m gonna just watch Netflix instead?

Or something else came up and someone needed your help...and you, without question threw yourself on the back burner again?

 

I want you to know that you are not alone...and there’s nothing wrong with you!!

 

But if you find yourself just existing... waiting for the other shoe to drop, that fear of recurrence hanging over your head like a massive black cloud...then PLEASE pay attention to this episode.

The truth is prioritizing our self-care was hard enough before we got Breast Cancer.

Now...with our limited amount of energy, brain capacity and the feeling that we have to put our superhero cape on and get back to wearing 10 hats a day...how on earth are we supposed to squeeze self-care in there too???

 

In this episode...

I share a story about Barbra, (she gave me permission to share this story with you). Barb, like most of the survivors I talk to, is someone who takes care of others...she’s a nurse, a mum, a wife and her elderly dad living with them too, since losing her own mum to breast Cancer just 5 years ago.

Barb spends every minute of every day caring with her beautiful heart for everyone else. In fact, she told me that she’s always taken care of everyone, even when she was a teenager, she was the one who made sure that all of her friends were safe, she was the one they all called for advice, she was the one that was always there for everyone else.

 

Maybe you can relate to this...I know I can...I was like Barb for decades!

That was...until I realized what it was doing to my health...and as Barb and I continued to chat,  she shared how scared she was about getting sick again. She didn't want her kids to feel the pain that she had felt herself, losing her own mum to breast cancer.

Barb had jumped right back into her old ways, taking care of everyone...even though she felt like she was running on empty all the time and in her heart of hearts she knew that this wasn’t going to help her get and stay healthy.

 

But she didn’t know what to do...she didn’t know how to change the situation, she felt stuck , she felt guilty because she felt like people had taken care of her while she was sick, especially during chemo...and she felt like she didn’t have the right to complain.

 

I shared with Barb, that I hear this so frequently...and if you’re feeling this way too...you are not alone! 

 

I also shared that there is ONE thing that silences that nagging fear of getting sick again and that is consistent self-care. In episode #19, I shared 3 key components to starting a consistent self-care habit.

 

So let’s take a quick look at why it can be so hard to prioritize our self-care (listen in for some more detail):

  • It's ingrained in our personality.
  • We often feel like we are not good enough.
  • We are always trying to make everyone happy. Putting everyone else’s happiness before our own, telling ourselves that when everyone else is happy then we’ll be happy too!

 

It can be uncomfortable to start focusing on ourselves, it can feel selfish...but it isn’t. Focusing on our wants and needs ...our self-care...is the ONLY way to silence our nagging fear of recurrence. 

 

To let you in the loop and hear how Barb is doing now…

 

Barb is now learning to practice daily self-care...she notices:

 

  • She’s less exhausted
  • Less frustrated
  • More patient with everyone else - her hubby loves this new Barb
  • Even having less hot flashes
  • She’s making better food choices (less sugar cravings)
  • Less joint & muscle pain
  • Enjoying her life more
  • Not living in fear every single day.

 

All by focusing her energy on herself first.

 

When we focus on ourselves first, we’re actually able to give much more to others...without feeling sucked dry and resentful. 

 

The only reason I can be here today and serve you ...is because I practice self-care first (without feeling guilty!!)

 

Need some self-care ideas?

No worries...I've got you covered! Hop on over to my blog 30 Quick, Easy & Inexpensive Ways to Practice Self-Care, there's even a FREE 30-Day Self-Care Calendar for you to download today and get started, just want the FREE calendar? Get yours here ⬇️

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